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photography, Kitti, art, me, kink

Kitti, the Unstoppable Hex Machine

...and a rock feels no pain, and an island never cries...

On Simply Living
So... for the last week or so, I've been living. That's kind of it. Just getting by, working, playing, all that jazzile. It took rather a large burst of emotion to do it, but it seems as though I'm somewhere *near* content.

Strange, ey? I mean, I'm not *actually* content... if you reach contentment then your life may as well be over. Of course I have ambitions and dreams and things... but I'm not overly worried about things like work, or money (neither of which are going brilliantly, but somehow I don't seem to care as much) It may be because I've met someone who seems to accept me as me. He may be crazy, but I'm not overly worried about that either.

for some weird reason I've got into the habit of just being alive: Taking opportunities when they arise and going from day to day, hour to hour.. just being me. When emotion gets the better of me, I meditate. I've also stopped worrying about my dependance of alcohol. The doctors all say there's nothing wrong with me - not enough to warrant a referral to a proper psychologist anyway, and phsyically they say I'm fine. So why the hell should I worry? I always used to say I just wanted to live life to the fullest (or die trying)... that was when I was 16. Guess I'm back again.

I've also taken a more voyeuristic approach to the stress of this beautiful city, rather than being emmersed in it like I used to be. I'm stay away from the BDSM scene for a while, too... I never really realised it before but being a young person in a community mainly composed of the over 40s can earn you a fuck of a lot of patronising bullshit. I guess I just let it wash over me before, and the flood has only just caught up to me.

Tomorrow, I get to see my family. More and more, I'm finding myself wanting to be with them. When I left, all I wanted to do was get as far away as possible and not until very recently have I wanted to go back at all. We'll see how that little slice of pie pans out.

Till next time.

Kit. xxx